Kink & BDSM-Friendly Therapy

A Judgement-Free Space to Discuss Sexual Exploration Safely & Openly

In the past several years, there has been an increase in the portrayal of kink and BDSM in the media. Without fail, it seems these representations are always centered around the same narrative. People engage in kink or BDSM. Then, they find “the one,” and love saves them from their alternative lifestyle. They live happily ever after vanilla sex and all. At Rhode Island Sex Therapy, we don’t think engaging in kinky sex or BDSM is something you need to be saved from. We’re not recommending therapy to “fix” you because we think you have a problem if you enjoy kinky sex or BDSM. In order to engage in kinky sex safely and receive the ultimate satisfaction from it, we know that you may need support in processing your needs and setting good boundaries. That’s where therapy comes in. I can help you seek out sexual relationships that fulfill your desires and meet your needs without crossing boundaries. You can learn more on this page, or by reaching out to schedule a therapy session with me. I’m Dr. Michael Stokes, a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist. At my practice, Rhode Island Sex Therapy, I can support you as you explore a range of sexual desires and experiences.

Are Kinks & BDSM Healthy in Relationships?

Short answer – yes. Longer answer – yes as long as those engaged in the acts are consenting, and boundaries are set and respected to ensure the safety and satisfaction of all involved. At the end of the day, anything that improves the intimacy bond within relationships and provides enjoyment, is healthy and beneficial for the relationship. However, it’s important to approach kink and BDSM with honesty and openness in the relationship. Each person involved should speak plainly about any concerns they have and set boundaries outlining what they are willing to do.

What if My Partner Thinks I’m Weird?

For many people, shame or embarrassment about their desire to engage in kinky sexual acts prevents them from discussing these desires honestly with their sexual partners. At the end of the day, your sexual partners may think what you’re interested in is weird, but if it’s what you need to achieve sexual satisfaction, it’s important to discuss it. Without exploring these desires, you may find yourself feeling resentful of your partner or at the very least not feeling sexually fulfilled by the relationship.

Do I Need Therapy?

The desire to engage in kinks or BDSM doesn’t in and of itself indicate a need for therapy, but there are many reasons people may want to schedule an individual or relationship therapy session as part of engaging in kinks and BDSM. To ensure the safety and satisfaction of sexual partners, working with a therapist may be beneficial. A sex therapist can help you talk through all aspects of your sexual desires, set healthy boundaries between sexual partners, and address any other concerns that arise.

How Do I Get Started?

When you’re ready to get started, I make it as simple as possible to get in touch with me. You can give me a call Rhode Island Sex Therapy at (401) 236-5021, email DrMichaelStokes@gmail.com, or use our contact form. I look forward to hearing from you.